If you’re anything like me, you may find yourself initially nervous about change. Often times, we get so comfortable in our own patterns and routines that we subconsciously let those circumstances become our definition of “normal” or “safe.”
When it comes to things like our living conditions, our family, or our friends, change doesn’t seem like it would be a welcomed occurrence. Human connection is one of the most important things in life, so this area especially can seem very fragile. The same concept applies to parts of our identity as well. Change— or even more so, loss— in these areas can feel unbearable. What we often don’t realize is that it’s normal for some people and some parts of our identity to come into and then go from our lives; that losing people does not mean we have lost our ability to connect, and losing pieces of our identity does not mean we have lost ourself.
Until you can begin to understand this concept and the reasons behind it, losing people can be a shot to your self confidence and losing pieces of your identity can feel like the props have been pulled from under you. These changes can feel like an unwanted rock to your seemingly perfectly-balanced boat, or a burst of your comfortable bubble.
With the absence of a relationship that you’re used to being there or something you’re used to defining yourself by, space is opened up in your mind for self-doubt to creep in— “What am I doing wrong?” or “What do I need to change?” are common questions that place themselves in the front of our minds when we lose anything.
When it comes to what you push away and what you pull closer, your energy is in control. The tricky part is that this ebb and flow will happen whether you acknowledge it or not. What I’ve learned, and what I want to share with you, is that if you choose to see this concept in action as a crucial contribution to your personal growth, things start to make a lot more sense.
To elaborate on choice: it sounds cliche, but you truly choose how a situation affects you, whether that is a conscious, intentionally-made decision or not. If you want to be upset and beat yourself up about loss, then you are choosing to question yourself and see change through the lens of loss. Similarly to how we have the option to let our minds think this way, we also have the option to think about it differently, and see change through the lens of growth instead.
If you haven’t heard of a concept called “The Law of Attraction,” let me enlighten you. The Law of Attraction States that whatever you focus on, think about, read about, and talk about intensely, you’re going to attract more of into your life. Thinking about the inverse of this, it would make sense for the things that don’t match the energy you’re putting out to slowly fall away as you are no longer pulling them toward you.
Something we need to remind ourselves of every moment is this: When you’re on the right path, people and opportunities will begin to come to you that are also found on that same path. As you raise your energy, you raise the standard for what you’re able to entertain with the energy you are now operating with. If there are things in your life that your intuition has caused you to question before, then odds are that as you raise your energy, these things will naturally stop being pulled to you, or even fall away completely.
Once you grasp this concept of attraction, you realize that it is crucial to constantly remind yourself of what you want to move toward, and keep this in the forefront of your mind at all times. It’s crucial to believe in what you want to attract. Trust your intuition, as this is the guide of our energy. Similarly to how a GPS system offers a path for your car, our intuition offers a path for our soul.
When properly nourished, our intuition can keep us on the path of our best and highest energy. The more you nourish and honor your intuition, the more you begin to see that with your energy sharpened, loss is simply a form of change; we are the ones that have added a negative connotation. No form of growth should ever be seen as negative— growth, in any form, is not only a privilege to us as humans, but a vital function of our body, mind, and spirit.